Lu Feminist, kah?

These days when young women come across the words ‘feminist’ or ‘feminism’ at all, it is most likely coming out the mouths of international pop stars.

Let’s face facts. Many of today’s young girls and women probably aren’t reading about feminism on great blogs like Feministing, or learning about Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s journey as a ‘happy African feminist’.

They don't know their Greer from their Pankhurst. They probably don’t read about feminism too much, except through news of a protest here and there, and a women’s rights article here and there.

More likely, they would have consumed feminism as a (mini) topic through the following women:

Pop superstar Lady Gaga: “I’m not a feminist. I hail men, I love men, I celebrate American male culture– beer, bars, and muscle cars.”

Pop superstar Beyonce: (The word ‘feminist’) “can be extreme…I guess I am a modern-day feminist. I believe in equality.”

Pop superstar Katy Perry: "I am not a feminist, but I do believe in the strength of women."

Pop superstar Taylor Swift: “I don’t really think about things as guys versus girls. I never have. I was raised by parents who brought me up to think if you work as hard as guys, you can go far in life.”

My heart would break a little every time someone would try to disassociate themselves from the word. Like it was an awful label that would forever cast you as a ranting, man-hating harpy, one who eschews the shaving of bodily hair and all that.

I understood where they came from, but a little part of me would whimper: ‘Oh no’.

What these women – some I admired - were saying was that they were uncomfortable with the word because they did not want to bash men. I also suspect they did not want to be judged by other women or feminists.

After all, some had songs with questionable lyrics or have embraced their bodies and aren’t afraid to show their fine form to the fullest.

They have also achieved such glittering heights and great fortune through hard work, and as such, are not too keen on saying life is unfair for women. It is quite possible they think it would be a bit rich to argue that they are oppressed.

I guess feminism as a whole also intimidates a generation of young women who aren’t familiar with the intellectual terms (Objectification, Patriarchal Masculinity, Intersectionality?), or feel conflicted about arguing over issues like the female body or the pro-choice movement. And let’s not get into the minefield of faith and feminism; or the pervasive view that some roaring feminists seem to, well, criticise other women quite severely.

I am not a gender studies scholar. I have not gone through the necessary feminist literature. Despite teenage and twenties’ moments of ‘I Hate Men!’ angst, I have loved men all my life, and now I love my husband most of all. I love that he opens doors for me, and I like chivalry in men.

I don't think of feminism in terms of men versus women. It was never a gender consideration, but I have worked with a boys’ orphanage for years.

I am still figuring out my thoughts on gender-based work quotas as I have issues with quotas in general. I am a combination of cin-cai and vain, like many women, and I am okay with women deciding to do whatever they like with their bodies. Whether or not it is classy – now, that is a different consideration altogether. I also struggle, sometimes, with my own position about the sex industry, Slutwalk, and various other feminist topics.

But I would say, yes, I am a feminist. If anyone asks. Lu feminist kah?

Of course I am a feminist. I don’t need to shout it out. I say it softly. Smiling. Calmly, with my tea cup and pinky raised. But how could I not be?

I base my ‘Duh, of course lah’ assertion on very basic principles, the best of which is most powerfully evident in pioneering feminist Susan B. Anthony’s words:

“Men, their rights, and nothing more; women, their rights, and nothing less."

Equal rights. To vote, to justice, to security, to work pay, to freedom, to live. So, yes, some may be preferring the words ‘humanist’ or ‘equalist’ to feminist, but it’s a no-brainer for me. To be a humanist or equalist is to be a feminist.

There are many different women all over the world, with different views, and thus even various types of feminism, and I will not get into that, or what I think about Femen here.

But the core of what I think should frame feminism for women is the social justice element : the fact that millions of women all over the world are still struggling for their rights, for justice, and protection against oppression and cruelty.

You will often hear people say, as an argument, that men all over the world also struggle for their rights, for justice, and protection against oppression and cruelty.

The difference is that for women, these hardships and the suffering are wrapped around their gender.

You don’t have to look far for examples, with social media already buzzing with several relevant, heartbreaking stories.

There is the ‘Bridenapping Epidemic’ in Kyrgyzstan, where thousands upon thousands of girls are kidnapped and forced into marriages.

There are the women like us who still can’t drive in Saudi Arabia. I repeat, lest you have read this so often you have forgotten how ridiculous it actually is – They are not allowed to drive.

There is the New Zealand Teen Rape Club, where young girls were preyed on and raped by a gang of teens, and the authorities failed to protect them.

There is the fact that in the developing world, one in seven girls is married before her 15th birthday, and some child brides are as young as eight or nine. Child brides are also a problem we have in Malaysia.

Oh, in Malaysia, we also joke about rape, evident in the #tipselakdirogol Twitter hashtag.

There are many more, and they make me seethe. I don’t care if they think feminists are always angry. Any decent human being would be purple with rage. Is this fair? Is this just? How could I not be a feminist? How could anyone not be a feminist?

It is wonderful that so many people, so many women, think females have got it good now. It is nice to focus on the glamorous pop superstars we love to watch, and feel that is so.

It is easy to think of how lucky some of us are, and how we have lives our female ancestors could never have dreamed of.

It is easier to forget that we could have easily been that girl, in that other part of the world, married off to a greybeard, forced into a demeaning life, with no voice and no way out.

And so, yes. I am a feminist - softly, calmly, smilingly so. It is the least hard answer for me. Of course I am a feminist. How could I not be?